High school paper analogies and metaphors

[ed]

I found this on the web and it struck my funny bone. http://www.qwertyed.com/q_pages/q6_fun_pages/analogies.html

[Steve Grisetti]

"He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River." How romantic!

[Greg mgm]

Some of those were pretty darn funny. Thanks for the link.

[Dave McElderry]

Haha...my favorite:

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

These remind me of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for worst opening lines:

http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness."

--Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford (1830)